Therapy can be a lifeline. But with options ranging from CBT and EMDR to high-tech treatments like MeRT and ketamine therapy, finding the right fit can feel overwhelming. So where do you begin?
According to Dr. Dakota Carter, a psychiatrist at Eisenhower Health in Rancho Mirage, it starts with showing up for an assessment —
not to commit to medication or a specific treatment plan, but to open a dialogue.
“Think about what you’re hoping to get out of therapy,” Carter says. “This is the opportunity to have an open conversation about where you’re struggling, what kind of support you need, and which treatment options might help.”
If you’ve ever gone down a Google rabbit hole trying to figure out which type of therapy is right for you, you’re not alone — it can feel like alphabet soup. There’s CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), a structured, skills-based approach that helps manage anxiety, depression, and obsessive thoughts. EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), often used for trauma, helps the brain reprocess distressing memories. DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) builds emotional regulation and coping skills, especially for mood disorders. Then there’s psychodynamic therapy, which explores your past and unconscious patterns to help make sense of your present.
“Finding a therapist is like finding a fabulous pair of shoes,” Carter continues. “You may see lots of shoes, and you may even try some on, but not all of them will fit — and that’s OK.”
The connection you feel with your therapist can be just as important as the method itself. If you’ve ever started therapy and thought, This doesn’t feel right, you’re not alone. It can be hard to know whether you’re just hitting a normal bump or it’s truly a mismatch.
“You should feel safe, challenged, and seen,” Carter explains. “It’s a hard part of the journey, but ask yourself honestly: Am I getting better? Do I feel connected to this person? Do I look forward to therapy, or does it feel like a chore?”
Thanks to the rise of both in-person and teletherapy options, it’s easier than ever to explore what works for you. But Carter offers one word of caution about going digital.
“Online therapy has really increased access, and some people feel more comfortable opening up from home,” he says. “But there’s a caveat: Therapy is an active process. If you’re the kind of person who logs in and just passively checks in, virtual therapy might not give you what you need.”
Finding the right therapist isn’t always straightforward, Carter says. But it’s less about landing on the “perfect” modality and more about discovering what helps you feel heard, understood, and equipped to move forward.
